Maria’s Two Week Staycation at Kaiser

Chapstick, R2D2 and the 9 o’clock shot..

Not to long after we made The Bet I get a text from Pancakes, saying the Dr reviewed her CT scans from our Sunday Funday and wanted her to come in to Kaiser for a few days. I text back, “when should I come visit?”   and me being me, I also told her  to not forget to pack her phone charger and her being her she told me that was one of the first things she packed. Later that night she told me all the test they were doing and might have to remove Rupearl (the PICC line) I kinda feel like I know a lot about this stuff my now kinda.  She also sent me her info and on where she was and said bring movies. 🙂

01.31
Saturday morning I got my backpack, packed my laptop never leave home without it and headed down to Irvine. Gas was at a low of $2.19 sweet! I got there parked and headed up to her room expecting some small depressing windowless room and when I walked in there was Pancakes with her trademark huge smile in a nice comfy bed watching Real House Wives of something on Bravo channel. This place was like a resort with the room service and hot nurses coming in and out of the room asking if she needed anything, we called it Chateau Kaiser. After hanging out for a few hours I got hungry and went and got Subway and of course as soon as I left I missed what sounded like the coolest thing of the day, A heart ultrasound. The rest of the evening, she pretty much just laughed and me and made the machine beep AND watched Pitch Perfect. She’s now ready for part 2 in May.

02.01
SuperBowl Sunday, luckly for her weekends are pretty chill so she got to watch it with out being poked all day. I was out shooting with Leanna, that day so I couldn’t be there. but that didn’t stop me from texting all day. The photos turned out amazing we got done and back home to watch the her team lose to the Patriots she said she was going for the Seahawks cause of the family history with USC and some of their players in the past are from there.  And just so we’re clear Missy Elliot was the best part of the half-time show. She told me she going to put on American Sniper DVD I bought her. But then I said, you could watch it OR I could come down tomorrow and we can watch it together.  She said ok put on  Gone Girl and tried watching it but nurses were coming in and out and thats one of those movies were you should pay attention.

02.02
Monday morning I’m out doing my three mile run, since I haven’t heard from her all morning I text to see how she was doing. She text back in her usual happy mode, “Hey 😀 the same” and that she just got back from having a CT scan. I wasn’t sure what that was so I asked and she said its kinda like an MRI.  About an hr later as I was texting her I get a message on my phone from ebay saying my old iPhone had sold. I was super happy so I took a screen shot of it and send it. Crazy because while my text was taking 2 mins to go threw she text me a with a bunch of sad face emoji. I asked her what happened?? and she must of waited like 5 but felt like an hour and then responded and she told me..”They are going to pull my Picc line, do a biopsy, put my to sleep and stick a camera in me and take pics of the back of my heart. The CT scan showed my original spots have gotten smaller but now there are more spots.” WOAH! I asked when and she said t possibly today and biopsy tomorrow.  and that the PICC line could be the cause of her infection. So i text back Ima get in the shower and come hang out with her? well while wating for her to text back they were removing Ruperl, and it got late so I said i’ll come tomorrow if she wanted. I told her if she got a new PICC line we were gonna name it Rupearla II, or Donte, thats a good name but she wasn’t having that and so Rupearla it is. 🙂 but for now she just got a temp IV we named Pearl. this was one of six different ones she was goin to have thew out the rest of the time she was there.
later that night I text her how she was doing and it wasnt too good. she was all freaked out about all the info about the test and things. I told her it will be just fine and to take her mind off it I told her about one of my plans for loosing our bet. I think it kinda worked, if it didn’t work I did something I cant believe I did.  I texted her saying, so I sold my iPhone and now I need a new one and if she wanted to pick out the color of the next iPhone, she said “yessssssss”  oh hell! so I told her to think hard cause its going to be the phone I’m stuck with for the next two years. right away she picked black. Glad she did too cause I would have gotten the gold. So an hour later I drove down there and picked up the black 64gb iPhone 6+ and I loooove it. Through out the rest of the night I texted her random videos and jokes, there was one good one Ima post at the end of this.

02.03
Biopsy day 🙁  I texted Pancakes around 9am with a picture of me holding up my old iPhone with caption “say good by to my iPhone” that phone has been to three states and two countries with me. It was gonna be missed.  I ask if she needed me to bring her anything, “A root beer? Rum? Coco pebbles? The best cereal ever.”  she said chapstick. that was random but ok and and any blue Gatorade. So I went on a mission to find the exact chapstick she wanted and I was outta there. Gas prices were slowly creapin up it was now $2.35.
I got to Kaiser and walked into her room where she was all drugged up from the biopsy. What I didnt know was that the drs check your lungs from your back, I thought it was from the front. SO this girl and chapstick is crack for her, she was so excited to see that than anything else I brought her that day. Every two mins, chapstick.. puts it down two-three mins, more chapstick few more mins more chapstick and this went on the whole night. She kept saying it was hard to breath but the nurses weren’t quite sure why. I met this one nurse she was super weird and funny. Maria told me how some of them were telling her how much she looked like actress Anne Hathaway. After giving her like 3 different IV’s that night they came back with some Benadryl, that just made my night she was soo loopy. I got a great video of her singing and then 10 mins later she passed out. Earlier I was trying to get a pic of her sleeping but didn’t like any of them but then finally with the Hipstamatic app I finally got a good one.  1130pm while she was sleeping and I was done editing photos and taking pics of her sleep I left her a note and a Instax Poloriod of us and headed home.

02.04
I got an awesome text from Pancakes saying “its not cancer or a tumor” and that its some kinda infection but they dont know from where.” few hours went by and she told me the x-rays came back and that a small portion of her lung collapsed. I thought that was pretty crazy AND she got another IV cause the last one who I named Jason was just no good.  inside joke.
The 9 o’clock Shot: So this is a blood thinning shot she gets threw an IV that is suppose to help prevent blood clots. When it goes in she described it as a burning feeling inside your blood and she hates it. 🙂 I wana try it.
I asked her how does she feel about tomorrow and she said, “Nervous but ok since I will be asleep. I’m just hoping i don’t have any discomfort after.” then she send me a pic of her eating the cheese-its that I brought her a few days before and said she was watching King of Queens. King of what???  Ive been trying to get her to watch Orange is the New Black for a few days now and still she haddnt put it on.. grrrrr!

02.05
I sent her this funny good morning text of this cartoon toothpaste guy, you can find so much random stuff on the internet. I asked her what time her “photoshoot” was, today was the day she was getting the camera stuck down her throat to take pictures of her heart. That would be pretty cool to see. Shes also meeting with an Infectious Diseases Dr. Kinda like House I guess. She text again a few mins later saying, I’ll see you when I wake up. Meanwhile, I’m over here dealing with a flakey model, who decided to flake on me at the last min with a whole bunch of bs excuses. dont you love those? wont be working with her ever. An hour and half later she was back and said it wasn’t to bad and she was feeling pretty normal.
Pancakes met with the infectious disease doc and she said, “they think I might have a small blood clot from the picc line and they ordered more blood n ultra sounds on my arms for the veins, and now I’m getting the 9 oclock shot TWICE a day.” More poking the Pancakes.

02.06
I text her in the morning as usual asking how she was doing? she told me she was ok 🙂 and has been resting all morning cause they gave her more sedation.  she got the results from yesterdays test and she told me there was a blood clout in her right arm that might have came from Rupearl and that her arm was sore from all the poking and stuff. but shes hanging in there.
I told her Sunday i’ll come down and we’ll have movie night 🙂

02.08
Sundays are so quiet there and chillaxin there. I made her some Rice Krispy treats so good and took her some more oatmeal cookies. tonights movie.. American Sniper. Today was the first day she got word from the one of the Dr’s that she might be going home soon.

02.09-02.10
I wore this shirt to the grocery store and as I was shopping, I kept thinking people were starring at me but in fact they were reading my shirt. I had 3 different people come up and say the same thing to me first they laugh and then say “I like your shirt.” It was funny but a little embarrassing.
so guess who started watching the Orange is the Black dvd I bought down? yep! finally! I think the first night she watched the first episodes back to back. I knew that was going to happen. funny thing she told me was that the nurses came into her room and turned down her tv while she was watching it. thats not a show you watch loud. 🙂
So the ct scan shows that the spots oh her heart are smaller but still there. I told her she has a Dalmatian heart.

02.11
I text her with a pic from outside on the porch of my parents house. Since she doesn’t get out much. she told me she’s been watching Orange.. dvd. see that? I got her hooked 🙂 While I was out shopping I heard this ring tone from this guys phone and right away texted her cause it was the noise R2D2 makes. which is perfect since she has her very own R2D2 thats shes hooked up to. So when I got home I downloaded a ring/text tone just like it for her.
the DR said, she wasn’t ready for a new Rupearl so she’ll probably be in there for another day.
later that night she text me “OMG I’m so smart After 4 days they have to put in a new IV and since I get my antibiotics every 8 I told them to take out the IV and at night when I need the medicine then they could put in another IV. I have 8 hrs not attached to anything.” she was so excited it was pretty funny. cause she told me she hasn’t taken a normal shower in 2 months.

This is R2D2. she pushed him around where ever she went.

02.13
Lucky Friday the 13th.  Awesome news coming from the OC today my friend who spent the past two weeks in Kaiser is finally going home! woowhoo! and its funny when she first mentioned shed be going home I called fFriday. 🙂 They gave her a new PICC line that we named Ruperla and said she should be leaving around 3oclock but then later turned into 6pm. Around 6 I get a text saying OMG its amazing outside 🙂 best news of the day.
“get ya cold cuts”

So heres her final pic of the two week staycation from Irvine.

THE END

Because I’m tired of writing.

 

THE JOKE

Two men camping in the mountains had spent four days together, and they were getting a little testy. One morning, the first friend says, “You know, we’re starting to get on each other’s nerves.  Why don’t we split up today. I’ll hike north and spend the day looking around, you hike south and spend the day. Then tonight, we’ll have dinner and share our experiences over the campfire.”

The second friend agrees and hikes south. That night over dinner, the first man tells his story. “Today I hiked into a beautiful valley. I followed a stream up into a canyon and ate lunch. Then I swam in a crystal clear mountain lake. As I sat out and dried, I watched deer come and drink from the stream. The wildflowers were filled with butterflies and hawks floated all day overhead. How was your day?” The second friend says, “I went south and ran across a set of railroad tracks. I followed them until I came across a beautiful young woman tied to the tracks. I cut the ropes off, gently lifted her off the tracks, and we had sex in every imaginable way all afternoon. Finally, when I was so tired I could barely move, So, I came back to camp.” “Wow!!” the first guy exclaimed, “Your day was MUCH better than mine. Did you get a blow job, too?”  “Nah,” says the second friend eating his meal, “I couldn’t find her head.”